Photo Above by ButterflySha. Photo Below by Steve Evans.
“If the only prayer you ever say in your whole life is ‘thank you,’ that would suffice.”
- Meister Eckhart, 1260– 1328.
I don’t remember the exact time it first happened, but I do remember it was during a gathering with my in-laws. My wife was seated on my right, and her grandmother was on my left side. On one end of the table was my father-in-law, and on the other end was my mother-in-law. Across from us was my brother-in-law, his wife, and between them sat Samantha, my niece and god-child. Food, glorious sustenance, was set out before us. Before anyone could lay one hand on a roll, Samantha said, for the first time of what would become a tradition at such gatherings, “We need to say the words!” My wife and I looked at each other in mild displeasure.
Why displeasure, you may ask? What exactly was it that I have against saying grace? It is because I felt excluded. Many non-Christians feel singled out when called upon to pray in public. Think of the position we are placed in: we can either pretend to pray with everyone else, betraying our own beliefs while insulting the integrity of the beliefs of others, or we can stand there in awkward silence, feeling out of place and perhaps a little bit ostracized. That may not be the intention of the practice of public prayer, but it is often the effect.
Non-Christians often develop a negative attitude in regards to prayer in general, due to our Christian brethren’s insistence on public prayer. In all honesty, this negativity may be part of what fuels the debate on school prayer. It is this reluctance to pray that concerns me - not only my own resistance to prayer, but the lack of prayer among non-Christians in general. The problem is that prayer is so much apart of the Christian experience, than when a person leaves the Christian religion, they feel they must leave behind this deeply spiritual practice as well.
The truth is, prayer has always been a meaningful method of communing with the Divine and has existed since the dawn of civilization. No one group of people can lay claim to this practice as being exclusively their own. As people of alternative spiritual paths, we need to recognize that it is everyone’s inherited right to communicate with the Divine through prayer. We need to reclaim prayer as our own and find a meaningful way in which people of all faiths can pray together.
So how will I reintegrate prayer into my spiritual practices without alienating my Christian in-laws? By requesting a silent prayer when in public, and praying in earnest when alone. Ironically enough, that is exactly how Jesus recommended that his followers pray. In Matthew 6:5, Jesus instructs his followers saying, “And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men.”
This passage in the Bible leads me to believe that perhaps even the early Christians felt excluded because of the practice of public prayer in ancient Rome. It does no one harm to gently remind them of that possibility. Next time I am at a gathering with family, perhaps I will do just that.
Originally posted September 29th, 2007.
written by John \\ tags: Christian, Faith, Family, Prayer, Religion, Ritual, Tradition
